When I told my husband I’d be writing about intimacy and sex his response was, “Well that blog will be pretty short since it’s non-existent…” Ugh, RUDE!
Maybe I’m in the minority here, but being a stay at home mom completely wears me out and by the time I’m woken up at 6:45 am by Lincoln, feed him breakfast, clean the house, make lunch, have play time, dinner for Lincoln, get Lincoln to bed, cook mine and Wesley’s dinner (no, my son doesn’t eat what we eat and that’s an entirely different issue), clean the kitchen, relax with a glass of wine, maybe get to watch my favorite tv shows, take a shower, brush my teeth and get into bed the LAST thing on my mind is intimacy. The problem is that sex and intimacy is a vital component in any relationship… at least it was when we were creating our bundles of joy so why should that change just because we are parents? Well, because it does! So how do we balance work, parenting, friendships, our significant others, etc and manage our intimacy life?! Well, we don’t… just kidding WE HAVE TO or none of us will have a second child and we’ll all be divorced single moms. There is a happy healthy balance and while some of us have found it others may still be searching for it. There’s no recipe for a perfect sex life and I certainly don’t have all the answers, but I have found a somewhat happy medium by doing some pretty basic things.
Now I love our television just as much as anyone, but there are times you just have to say NO to TV! I challenge everyone out there to dedicate one night a week to no tube. Instead turn on the I-Pod (my favorite Pandora station is Ray LaMontagne, Click his name to listen…his music is pretty steamy), get 2 glasses of wine, and cook together! My husband and I will stand in the kitchen while I do the cooking, chat about our day/week, enjoy cheese and crackers, laugh, chase Lincoln around if he’s still awake, and just enjoy one another. We make it a point to eat at our dinner table at least 6 nights a week, which also gives us some intimate time. I know this is a stretch, but try holding hands while talking at the dinner table or just a simple touch here and there… it’s easy to forget, but remember when we were on those first few dates and we couldn’t take our hands off our future baby daddy??? Well, try to get back to that place! It’s not dead, I promise; it’s just hidden behind laundry, dirty diapers, and spit up. Another fun game to try is High and Low. Talk about the high of your day and the low of your day. It’s fun and it gets you engaged in one another’s day.
I get it, sometimes we are tired, worn out, and just not “in the mood,” but if you try to break up the monotony of the day and enjoy one another’s company you might be surprised at how easy the “Welcome Mat” lays itself down at the side of the bed.
Please replace this text with the content (images, download links etc) that will be shown to users after they like your article.
My favorite blog, yet! Love the topic and tips. My experience is that hand sweat isn’t as adorable when you’re not dating…kidding! Such a good idea to turn on the tunes and relax. One thing we do is play a board game. It brings out a fun competitive spirit which can turn steamy…Oh la la!
Okay, in all seriousness, how do you combat the constant technology in your house? If the TV is off, what about your phone, what about your computer. I feel like our time together that is completely free of distractions is when we’re in bed snoozing.
I always have the computer put away before Wesley gets home, BUT I don’t work. Personally I think work can wait until the morning… nothing is more important than family time. Most people know they can’t get a hold of me when Wesley gets home. I usually have my phone on silent or I just ignore it (sorry mom). I’m so connected to the technology world during the day and once Wesley is home I just shut it all down.
Cody and I try and do the same thing, sometimes its hard to shut out all technology but we still put forth the effort!! We also decided not to put a TV in our room!! By the way I love your blog I look forward to reading it everyday!!! Way to go!! I know it is tough being a SAHM (I’ve done it for the past 10 years) 🙂
I am implementing one of your tips…downloaded Pandora on my iPhone this morning! Maybe we will try “no TV night” tonight. Before I commit to that, is there anything good on Tuesday night that I might be missing??
Unless you’re in to MLB and Dancing With the Stars, there’s nothing on tonight! Give it a whirl! I hope you enjoy Pandora radio… I love it.
Allison this is your best blog I love it you & Wes are super cute!!