I’m terrified of what might happen should this teeny tiny robot disappear.

A few mornings ago, Lucy crawled into bed with me. She was being extra cute and giggly. We were pillow-fighting when she suddenly jumped on top of me with all of her weight and wrapped her little hands around my throat. I know she was just playing, but my mind immediately went THERE and I thought, Holy crap, is my child trying to kill me?

We all have those moments when we’re not sure what is normal toddler behavior or if our child is about to cross over into de-winging insect territory. And when those adorable giggles sound like maniacal laughter, do we laugh along with them or call a child psychologist? Nobody wants to think they’re raising a future Lizzie Borden.

Most of what I’ve read about toddler behavior says it’s pretty normal to have ups and downs. One minute Lucy will be happily playing by herself and the next she’ll be clamped on my leg screaming that she kind find her mini, tiny robot that is her favorite toy at the moment. Shakeups mostly occur when we’re out of our normal routine. Last week, we finally ditched Lucy’s binky (no judging) and since then, you’d think she’s been visited by Freddy Krueger judging by how bad it’s been to try to get her to sleep at night. She’s a hysterical mess starting from bathtime to PJ time to story time to bedtime. She’ll wake up screaming 3 times at night. When it’s finally morning, she’ll come tip-toeing into our room and will gently wake me up by saying, “Mommy, can you please get up? I need to go potty.”

Last night when Todd came home, she bit him and giggled like he was a snack. Then a minute later she said, “I’m sorry Daddy,” with her lip curled out just right.

She gives PMS-me a good run for my money when it comes to the mood swings. It’s important to set boundaries because then she will push them.

The pseudo-strangling was hopefully an isolated incident. She sensed my alarm immediately and let go. I told her that wasn’t nice to touch me that way and it made Mommy upset. She touched my face and said, “I’m sorry, Mommy.”

Then she proceeded to pull the legs off of an ant.

Just kidding!


What does your toddler do to make you question their sanity?


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