Being a mom has been the hardest job to date. Nothing could prepare me for the lack of free time and overflowing to do lists that come along with being a parent. I often say that going from zero to one child was definitely harder than adding a second child. I am a little over 3 years into my executive role as a mommy, but being a mom has forced me to find my true self.

When we had our oldest daughter in 2012, she became our singular focus and our world was turned upside down. Routines were thrown out the window and no books available on how to get your life back in order after baby. My husband and I learned how to lean on each other for help, but we also let ourselves go in the process.  “Letting yourself go” is such a relative phrase, but for me it meant losing confidence and gaining weight.  I vividly remember my personal trainer asking me to rate my self confidence on a scale of 1-10. I vulnerably answered with a 4. It was in that moment I realized that I never wanted to feel that way again. I had let myself go. Instead of controlling my emotions, I let my emotions control me.  I learned that letting go, physically and emotionally, usually goes hand in hand with self esteem.  I feel that when your self esteem deteriorates, it can make a huge impact on your relationships. Over these past three years, I had to learn how to take back control and transform my lifestyle. It might sound cliche, but I am a much better mom, wife, friend, and daughter when I am balanced. Am I perfect? No. Will I always struggle with this? Probably. For me, it’s all about remembering the “why’s” to help stay on track.

Here are 5 Reasons Why You Shouldn’t Let Yourself Go:

  1. Self Worth :: You deserve to be the best version of yourself.  To truly be happy in life, we have to remember that we have to look out for ourselves. There is no point in suffering inside while we make others happy. Take time to check in with yourself physically, mentally, and spiritually. It is easy to get off balance. Wake up 45 minutes early to get in devotional time, a quick workout, or a hot cup of coffee before the kiddos wake up. I’m telling you, it has made the world of difference for me! You start your day feeling accomplished before the morning rush begins.
  2. Your Spouse/Partner :: Keeping it sexy for your partner is just as important as any other aspect of your relationship that needs nurturing. Of course they fell in love with the person you are at the core, but it is healthy to maintain the physical attraction too.   I am aware that my hubby truly appreciates that I take care of myself too. He has loved me through every shape and size , but physical attraction is still a huge part of a happy marriage in my opinion. With that said, I am usually found in yoga pants and a messy pony tail. Sexy doesn’t have to mean lingerie.
  3. Remember Who Is Watching :: Set an example for your kids and celebrate your victories with them…they are the best cheerleaders!
  4. Pampering is fun :: Sometimes a spa day is just what the doctor ordered. If you hit a certain goal, schedule a well deserved pedicure or massage.
  5. You deserve to be the type of woman you want to be :: This might sound silly, but write out a personal mission statement. A description of the type of woman or mom you want to be. Don’t become a victim to your excuses. I don’t mean strive to be the best Pinterest mom at school…that’s exhausting! Set realistic goals.

Before I get any hate comments below, I do want to stress that I am well aware that life can get in the way. A family member can get sick, you can lose your job, or be up to your eyeballs in school activities. Life is hard. I want this blog to simply be an encouragement from one mom to another. Everyone has their own version of “being happy” and we all deserve to find that. Life is too short.


  1. Thank you so much for this, I really needed it! I have an 8 mo old beautiful baby girl and she is my whole world. But lately I have felt I am losing myself and I know I need to make it a priority to get back in gear, get healthy again and feel better about myself. Your words brought me encouragement and inspiration and I’m ready to take on my new goals just for me! I want to be the best mama I can possibly be and to do that I have to start with myself. Thanks for helping me see that more clearly! ❤️

  2. Thank you for your post. I’ve been letting myself go for years. I spent most of my marriage taking care of a sick husband, and now that he’s gone, I’ve been consumed with being a mom to my two little boys. I’ve decided that 2016 will be my best year ever, and what better way than starting to take care of myself.

  3. Amen!!!!
    Personally I received very similar advice from a substitute teacher when I became a new mom in high school. 22 years later, I still value that advice and share it when possible. Often it’s advice women don’t want to hear. I’m thankful that I now have this article to share when the opportunity arises.


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