25 Things I Miss About My Pre-Baby Life
When I mentioned to my husband that I was thinking of writing this post, he worried that it might be kind of a downer. I jokingly said that I could add a subheading/qualifier to the title. Something like, “25 Things I Miss About My Pre-Baby Life, But Don’t Actually Miss at All Because Having Kids Made My Life Blissfully Complete.”
I get what he was saying. I love my son so much, and in all the ways that matter, I love how my life has changed since having him. Sometimes I do miss things like sleeping in and having more free time, but those are tiny sacrifices to make for the immense joy he’s brought me. I cannot imagine my life without him, and I wouldn’t want anyone to think otherwise.
However, I don’t think it’s helpful to other moms to act like everything is blissful, all the time. It’s okay to pine for aspects of our pre-baby lives sometimes, especially on the days when post-baby life feels extra hard. It helps me feel less alone, and less guilty, when other moms are willing to share the less rosy side of motherhood. So in the spirit of sharing and not feeling guilty, here’s my list of things I miss about life before babies.
- A clean car that that isn’t covered in Goldfish dust and applesauce pouch caps.
- Going to the movies. Even when we do have a date night, my husband and I never go to the movies for fear that the movie will suck and we’ll have wasted 2+ hours of precious baby-free time.
- Binge watching shows. These days, if I manage to stay awake for two episodes in a row, that qualifies as a binge.
- Not having to jump over a baby gate every time I go down the stairs, or open a cabinet lock to get to the recycle bin.
- Setting an alarm clock. I haven’t set one in the morning since my son was born 18 months ago. The baby monitor works just fine since he wakes up at 6 or 6:30. (I am not a morning person, so that’s plenty early for me.)
Having an entire weekend day free to do whatever I want—sleep, work out, clean, run errands, meet up with friends, veg out, or all of the above!
- Going to the bathroom without someone banging on the door or trying to flush the toilet while I’m still on it.
- Only having to do laundry once a week.
- Only having to run the dishwasher once a week.
- Listening to my own music in the car instead of “Trot Old Joe” or “Skip to My Lou” from my son’s baby music class. Though some of those songs are pretty catchy.
- Not feeling completely wiped by 7 p.m.
Spontaneous date nights. And not having to fork over a fortune for a babysitter when we do plan a date night.
- Staying out late without worrying about how I’ll survive the next day on so little sleep.
- Eating whatever I want, whenever I want. Now I have to hide in the pantry or behind the fridge door because the instant my toddler sees whatever I have he will demand some (or all) for himself.
- Not ending every day with a toy pickup that involves me laying flat on my stomach looking for puzzle pieces and cars under the couch.
- Wearing clothes because they’re cute, not because they’re easy to chase my toddler in. (Or, up until a few months ago, because they’re easy to breastfeed in.)
- My pre-baby and pregnancy hair. That is, not having a million frizzy baby hairs along my hairline that can only be tamed with a toothbrush sprayed with hairspray.
My pre-baby boobs. There’s no hairspray trick that can bring them back to life.
- A living room that isn’t constantly on the brink of being overrun by toys.
- Relaxing plane and car rides where I can catch up on sleep, podcasts and trashy magazines.
- Packing light.
- Taking our dogs to restaurants and other places. Nowadays, we usually have our hands full with our toddler so they don’t get to go on as many adventures.
- Wearing my hair down instead of in a “mom bun.”
- Wearing long earrings without worrying about them getting ripped out of my earlobes.
- Having a clean house that stays clean for more than 30 minutes.