Finding The Good In Facebook Mom Groups

Facebook Mom Groups

These virtual tribes are a somewhat new dynamic in the world of motherhood.  Moms of other generations have not experienced them, therefore they are uncharted parenting territory.  Love ’em or hate ’em, they are everywhere and only seem to be growing in numbers.  Chances are, if you are a mom on Facebook, you are a member of at least one, two, or maybe twelve.  In theory, Facebook mom groups are supportive, resourceful, fun, non-judgemental, compassionate, and connective.  But if you are part of one, you know that this isn’t always the case.

Despite their popularity, their rules, and their good intentions, mom groups can get UGLY.  Of course each one is different and each mother’s experience varies, but lately, I couldn’t help but notice an influx of eye rolls, gripes, and swearing off of them completely. I totally get it.  Sometimes these groups are straight up crazy. 

Warm Fuzzies

In the spirit of the holiday season and in an attempt to boost a declining reputation, I want to highlight some of the ridiculously wonderful things that happen in mom groups every single day.  Get your hormonal mama-self ready for warm-fuzzies!

  • Moms are kind.  One mom posted that she couldn’t afford a Halloween costume for her kid and was looking for a second hand one.  Within less than an hour, another mom had let her pick one out online and the order was placed for her.  I’ve seen the exact same situation with Christmas and birthday gifts.  
  • Moms share random coupons for formula, diapers, etc.  Every penny counts for a lot of moms, so when someone knows they won’t use a coupon, they don’t just throw them in the trash.  They even go the extra mile and send them in the (actual) mail. 
  • Moms share breastmilk.  For adopted babies, for mothers who couldn’t nurse but wanted to, for pink eye, for tummy troubles, for any reason.  And for the love, it gets me right in the feels every single time.  
  • Moms give away diapers.  Again, moms know that every penny and every diaper counts.  If they have a half a package left of a size or brand that they no longer need, under no circumstance will they go to waste.  
  • Moms give.  Kids are expensive and they grow out of their clothes and their gear in a hot minute.  Moms donate anything and everything to help each other out.  
  • Moms open up.  Being a mom is so hard at times.  Moms share stories of postpartum anxiety, depression, and every other struggle in the book.  And in these mother’s brave vulnerability, they help other mothers cope, heal, and thrive. 
  • Moms ask for help.  They set their pride aside and tell a virtual room full of mostly strangers that they need help.  Emotional help, financial help, physical help.  And the help, the hugs and the encouragement comes out in droves.
  • Moms support other mom businesses.  Most moms would much rather give their business to a fellow mother than buy from a large corporation.   The commerce that takes place as a result of #mombusinessmonday is literally life changing for some moms. 
  • Moms also support kid businesses.  Teaching our kids the value of work ethic and earning an honest dollar is so important for our future generations.  Bravo to the moms who support teenage lawn businesses or a young girl’s little craft shop; these little entrepreneurs are our future. 
  • Moms post really funny mom memes and GIFs.  Random laughter is always good in my book. 
  • Moms save lives.  Sounds a little dramatic, but it couldn’t be more true.  A mom needed courage and help to leave her abusive husband immediately one night.  Another mom felt as though suicide was her last option and oh-so bravely asked for help.  Yet another mom couldn’t put a roof over her children’s heads.  The mom groups show up in a way you couldn’t even believe.  At the drop of a hat, out come these women offering the safety of their homes, professional help, rides, money, hugs, and the kind of support that only other mothers could.  And the next morning, they check on each other to make sure they made it through the night.  I literally have goosebumps as I write this.  
  • Moms pray.  Even if they can’t offer a tangible resource, when prayers are asked for in a mom group, prayers are sent.  I’m not sure God ever saw that one coming, but he must be smiling down on it. 
  • Moms apologize.  As I stated at the beginning, mom groups can get ugly.  There is cattiness, sarcasm, and blatant judgement.  And truth be told most of us are just a sleep deprived ball of hormones and sometimes it’s easy to lose our cool.  But time and time again, I see moms apologize.  We screw up, we learn, we apologize, we forgive, and we keep going.  We co-exist and we are better for it. 

Mom groups aren’t always the easiest bunch.  But if you look for it, you will find the good.  There is so, so much good.  We are the mothers of Facebook mom groups and we have the power to make them what they are. 

Experience a great mom friend moment in a mom Facebook group? Please share in the comments!

Cheers, mamas.  Proud to know you. 


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