Goal-Setting With The Family
We are in 2019! Take a moment to reflect on the year gone by.
How does it make you feel? Are there things you wish you had accomplished? What would you like to do more of, less of and maintain in this new year?
Introspection is important because it helps us move ahead in life; correct our mistakes and concentrate on our wins. That is true for the individual and now, let’s extend this concept to the family. Do you feel connected to your family?
We lead such busy lives that sometimes we forget this basic fabric of family bonds needs attention too. In this new year, let’s be intentional about our goals and vision for our family.
Explore the idea of family goal-setting for growing and working together as a family, using the following steps:
- Pick one goal
Go around the table and ask each family member to list one goal. Then, pick the common goal.
- WOOP Your Goal
The WOOP method stands for Wish, Outcome, Obstacle, Plan and helps you pave the way to hitting your goal. This method also provides structure and accountability to your family goal.
Wish: Think of your goal as your wish.
Outcome: Imagine you hitting your goal and what that would look like.
Obstacle: Identify the main obstacle inside you that stands in the way and imagine it for a few minutes.
Plan: If faced with obstacle X, then you will take action Y.
Create, print and display this WOOP sheet on your family wall to help everyone stay on track, which will act as a roadmap for making this wish come true.
- Stay accountable
Revisit your goal occasionally or quarterly to review if progress is being made. Discuss what’s working and what’s not working as a family, and make adjustments as needed.
Looking for real-life examples? Here are four family goals you can set anytime of the year to become a family of purpose:
A. Family nights. Finding time together is more difficult with work, school and extracurriculars. Between music, sports, and other activities, families may spend many evenings apart. Having a consistent, scheduled evening to spend time together is key, be it weekly or monthly. It allows family members to reconnect, set aside all digital devices, and truly come together as a family. Plan a family movie night with popcorn, or game night with munchies, or make dinner together as a family.
B. Family dinners. There’s something calming and comforting about coming together at the end of a busy day, surrounded by good food and a relaxed atmosphere. This gets easier to do as children get older and can contribute to setting up and cleaning up. Family bonds are forged over warm dinner conversations and as parents, we enable our kids have a positive association and hence, a healthy relationship with food.
C. Date nights. When parents spend quality time with each other, the positive effects trickle down to the kids. Happy parents make for happy kids. Even though this goal doesn’t include kids, it benefits them indirectly. They also look at their parents’ marriage as a benchmark for marriages in general. Subconsciously, they pick up behaviors that may manifest in their future relationships.
D. Acts of service. Giving back to the community is a fundamental value that should find a place in every individual’s heart. Hone in on a project that aligns with your family’s passions and offer your services to another person or organization. Children learn to be compassionate and empathetic when they are involved in acts of service.
Setting family goals, working toward them and celebrating your cooperative efforts will deepen your family’s connection and help you focus on what truly matters to your family.