I’m a firm believer that few things are more important for a mom’s happiness and mental health than a well-timed, fun-filled Girls’ Night Out. Motherhood isn’t easy, and we moms need the support and friendship of our fellow moms to keep us chugging along on those days when we feel like throwing in the towel. Just a few hours spent away from our kids, with other women in our same stage of life, can provide us with the energy and enthusiasm we need to face our children bright and early the next morning.

While these nights with friends are almost always fun, they aren’t always as fulfilling as we might like them to be. As women, we rarely find ourselves at a loss for words when we’re with our girlfriends, but I’m sure I’m not the only mom who has returned home from a night out with the girls wishing that our conversations had moved beyond parenting horror stories, complaints about our husbands, and our latest Target finds.

There’s nothing wrong with surface-level discussion topics, and sometimes a lighthearted conversation is just what the doctor ordered. But if you and your mom friends are looking to go a little deeper, might I suggest introducing one or more of the following conversation starters at your next Girls’ Night? These questions will lead your group in getting to know each other better and will help build a deeper foundation for your friendships. (Many of these would also work well as discussion topics for your next date night, or—if you’re the self-reflective type—as prompts to take to your journal.)

1. What do you love most about yourself? What is one thing about yourself that you wish you could change?

2. If you could choose any career, what would it be?

3. When and where did you meet your spouse? How long did you date before you knew he was The One?

4. If family and finances were not a factor, where would you choose to live? Why?

5. What book (or television show or movie) has had the biggest impact on your life?

6. What is the most important value that you want to instill in your children?

7. If you could choose to give up (or delegate) one parenting or household responsibility, what would it be?

8. What is something everyone else seems to love that just isn’t for you?

9. What aspect of motherhood brings you the most joy? What part of motherhood is most difficult for you?

10. Is your life how you expected it to be? If not, why?

11. What are your family rules? How do you enforce them?

12. What are you assuming about others? What do you think others assume about you that isn’t true?

13. Share a fact about yourself that nobody else at the table knows or would be able to guess.

14. Describe your perfect day.

15. What is your parenting mantra?

16. What tip, tool, or piece of advice would you like to share with every new parent?

17. What is the best trip you have ever taken? What made it great?

18. Do you have morning or evening routines? What do they look like?

19. Describe your dream dinner party. Who would be there? What would you eat? What would your group talk about?

20. What is your biggest pet peeve?

21. How is your kids’ childhood different from your own?

22. What keeps you up at night?

23. What are you most proud of?

24. What is your mom Super Power? What would you like it to be?

25. What are five things that are saving your life right now?

I hope these conversation starters help you get the ball rolling on some deeper, heartfelt conversations at your next Girls’ Night. If all else fails, just share your best poop stories and call it a conversational win!