You’re Doing Parenting All Wrong

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Photo Courtesy: Jessica Rockowitz Photography + Film

Welcome to parenting, where you’re given no guide to navigate yet still manage to do it all wrong.

If you grew up in a perfectly parented home, hopefully you can pass along the goodness. If you try to course-correct some of the ways you were parented, watch out for swinging too far in the opposite direction. And if you didn’t spend 18+ years of life in quality future-parent training, sigh, may the odds be ever in your favor.

I don’t even know how parents back in the day made it without the guiding knowledge of Facebook and Google. Oh wait, apparently that’s why parenting is all wrong these days. Or is it because we were parented all wrong and weren’t passed along the guidebook?!?

Who knows. I can’t keep up.

I’m currently reading yet another parenting book that indirectly preaches how what we’ve been doing is all wrong, and it has me feeling #overit.

If you feed your children fruits and veggies, it’s probably too much fruit and not the right type of veggie. If it’s whole grain bread, didn’t you know all grains are the devil?

Try to protect your kid from the sun with sunscreen, and now you’re exposing them to toxic chemicals. Keep them inside too much, and you’re killing their vitamin D and imagination.

Request no gifts (or heaven forbid, practical items) for a birthday party, and now you’re denying your child the fun of being a kid and the joy of receiving gifts. Too many presents – unappreciative and spoiled.

Time outs are good. Time outs are bad. Time outs are only effective when consistently used in a certain way as a consequence to only specific behaviors.

You can never give too much love, but be wary of overindulgence. You don’t want to be too soft!

I mean it really doesn’t matter how you parent, you will inevitably be doing it wrong, at least to someone or to some article, and if not today, it will definitely be wrong one day, and you will have to live with the repercussions of how you messed up your kid’s life.

No wonder older generations get annoyed by us.

Or rather, we could just accept that we will be wrong because for every thing we’re doing wrong, to someone we’re doing it right.

I remember the regular sundae treats my grandma would buy me after school and our shopping trips to the mall.

I loved riding around the neighborhood on bikes… with my friends… without supervision.

Both of my parents worked and commuted. They outsourced a bit. I still love them.

We watched so much MTV – probably at too young of an age – and we survived.

I appreciate ALL the memories my dad captured on his clunky video recorder and the pictures my mom took on her camera and filled into albums. Imagine if they had social media!

Yes, my mom packed my lunches and cut the crust off my sandwiches… and I still enjoy eating sandwiches that way to this day.

I was spoiled with home-cooked meals and getting my laundry done, and I managed to turn into a responsible, independent adult.

The list goes on and on.

I’m just thankful we were parented with a few less rules and a little less guilt. My life (and I think myself!) turned out quite alright.

If we give ourselves a little more grace, use our gut, quit over-analyzing, live, love and enjoy parenting, I think we’re probably all going to turn out ok too. Our kids may even love us for it!

You may parenting all wrong, but you’re also probably parenting all right.

 

Photography: www.jessicarockowitz.com

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