ADHD impacts our children in more ways than we even realize.
Parenting a child, any child, comes with its highs and its lows. Parenting a child with differences whether mental or physical, presents another layer of challenges no one ever prepares you for.
RELATED READING :: Raising a Child with ADHD From a Mom’s Perspective
We, as parents, know to love them, teach them, encourage them, nurse them back to health, coach them and all the little things in between. We don’t always know what to do when we are presented with a diagnosis; a diagnosis that can have a minimal to severe impact on their everyday functioning. ADHD is one of those diagnoses, many would quantify as having a minimal impact in the grand scheme of things. However, for those of us who have a child with ADHD we see it differently.
The hardest thing about ADHD is that it’s ‘invisible’ to outsiders. People just assume that we are not being good parents and that our child is a brat, when they don’t have an idea how exhausted we truly are.” -S.C.
And while you may be exhausted, you are not alone mamas. Here are some my top parenting tips for raising a child with ADHD:
1. Create a routine.
At home, there are lists and boards posted up around their rooms. Reminders to do simple things like brushing teeth, getting a backpack together, packing a mask, etc… Everyday we do the same thing in the morning and in the afternoon. The expectations rarely change. We have found that consistency is key; even if we have to do it over and over.
2. Be consistent.
Be consistent in your expectations. Children with ADHD do not do well with vagueness. They need clear, simple, concise and consistent directions and feedback. Too much information and they check out. Being consistent allows them to know what to expect from you and what you expect from them.
3. Be patient.
And boy do I mean patient. Everyday your patience will be tested. And it’s okay if you lose your cool sometimes. Ask for forgiveness, but also forgive and move on. They will have meltdowns and bad days. Being patient allows them to cool down in those heated moments.
4. Communicate.
Communicate with their teachers, day care providers, grandparents, aunts, uncles, friends and other people in their lives. Create a tribe for yourself, but more importantly for them. They need all the love and patience that others can provide as well. Having an open line of communication with their teachers is important for their success. You need to know what’s going on at school and teachers need to know if they had a bad day or if you forgot their medication. Clear two-way communication is key.
5. Talk to your pediatrician.
Some parents choose the medication route, while others have more conservative views and making this choice is a personal one to make for you and your family. Talk to your pediatrician about your options, your observations of your child’s behavior and recommendations to help you support them. Consulting a medical professional is necessary so that we are informed.
6. Love them.
Most important of all is to love them. Kiddos with ADHD experience everything more intensely than their neurotypical friends. As a result, they may yell, engage in very impulsive, unsafe behaviors, be more moody on some days and energetic on others. They may forget their homework, argue, cry, laugh, be loud and down right annoying on some days. But we love them intensely each and every day and tell them tomorrow will be a better day. Our consistent love for them let’s them know they are safe and loved.
ADHD is not a disability; it is only a different ability.
