I’ve never been able to stick to New Year’s resolutions – it always seems like the minute I make the resolution, my window of opportunity to – eat the ice cream, not work out, curse – is closing. It never feels like I’m making my life better, it always feels like I’m about to put restrictions on my life.

Workout more…

Drink less…

Call relatives more…

Spend less….

Relax more…

Worry less…

But one day I realized that all my New Year’s resolutions had one root – “be better to myself.”

I realized that could go days, even years, addressing the symptoms, but they’d keep popping up – like playing a game of whack-a-mole. If I ever wanted real, lasting change – I’d have to address to underlying issue.

The ONE and ONLY resolution that ever worked for me was:

Act like I am worthy, act like I deserve good, honor myself. Only take actions and make decisions that honor who I am.

I interpreted honor to mean – saying “no” to things that don’t feel right and saying “heck yes!” to things that I love to do. Saying “no” to being in relationships with people who I’m not so sure about and saying “heck yes!” to things that make me laugh. Saying “no” to anything that holds me down and saying “yes” to joy and growth and adventure.

Honor is a high bar, but when I kept honor at the forefront of my decision making:

I ate better – and exercised more – because if I’m honest, eating 1 slice of cake is amazing – eating 6 makes me feel like poop. Going to a dance class with my girlfriends is fun and a mood booster – and no exercise makes me cranky. Getting on scale makes me feel like crap – so I don’t do it anymore!

So instead of resolving NO CAKE – ALL GYM – SKINNIER JEANS. I just shifted my perspective and adjusted to what made me feel good.

When I kept honor at the forefront of my decision making:

I spent less money – and saved more money – because if I’m honest, shopping for decorations does not make me happy. The thought of organizing and cleaning and storing decorations gives me anxiety. I know – all moms should love to decorate – but I don’t! I love to look at decorations – but don’t love all that comes with decorating.

So instead of saying – NO SPENDING ON FRIVOLOUS THINGS – I just focused on what brought me joy and allowed myself to not feel pressure to keep up with my friends or neighbors.

I even fully emptied out our storage unit and most of our garage this year. I GAVE IT AWAY and I felt free.

When I kept honor at the forefront of my decision making:

I began to have better relationships. I could no longer justify being in dramatic relationships – (maybe I was the dramatic one – and maybe the other person was) either way – I didn’t have space for it anymore. Drama doesn’t honor me or anyone else for that matter.

So instead of saying – ONLY DATE GOOD GUYS (this realization happened before I met my husband), or, ONLY BE FRIENDS WITH PEOPLE WHO HAVE GOOD MORALS – I said that I’d honor myself and others – and I didn’t engage in relationships that didn’t meet that criteria. I started to give more time to the people I really loved and I started to enjoy life more – daily!

The list went on and on for me and the result was more joy, confidence, less anxiety, deeper relationships with people I love and better sleep at night.

HONOR – took me further than a diet, or committing to the gym, or committing to drinking less ever could.

I believe that when we realize that we each deserve goodness and honor and that we are worthy- so many crappy things will fall by the wayside — because we KNOW that we know that we know – we are worth more.

Wishing you a 2017 filled with joy, love and good night’s sleep!