Editor’s note: The opinion reflected in this blog post is held specifically by the contributing author. This blog post is intended simply to express one author’s personal perspective. Austin Moms Blog highly respects all of the varying opinions of our contributors and readers and we kindly ask that all comments are respectful of the contributing author.
“Mommy, I don’t want to be a big girl,” my oldest says to me as I am tucking her into bed. We say our nightly prayers and I cuddle her. My brain starts to wander about my daughters’ futures. My oldest is almost 3 ½ and enrolled in a church pre-school. But with all the back-to-school photos dancing around Facebook it is hard for me to avoid thinking about the looming kindergarten.
To preface this, I am a former public school English teacher… I taught 9-12th grades for five years. I had incredibly challenging years and I had incredibly wonderful years. But when I brought my first daughter home, I was determined to find a way to stay home.
Now that I am on the other side, as a mom deciding the best fit for my children for their education, I think about my career as a public-school teacher and all that I learned. Here are a few of my reflections of why I don’t want my kids going to public school:
- The rigor and overall education is going down the tubes fast in public schools
- The respect is baffling…most kids do not respect their teacher as they age and teacher’s lose their authority in the classroom quickly. (Admin support is often unavailable.)
- Social media and smart phones have drastically hurt the focus and learning in the classroom.
- The social aspect is scary… I am genuinely scared to put my daughters into public schools for that reason the most.
- They are not safe, doors were propped open every single day, someone could walk in at any point and harm students.
- Character building is not a priority.
- Many kids fall in the cracks and admin beg teachers to pass most students along, even when it is a disservice to the kids.
- Having an IEP or any kind of learning disability is often a giant joke and not taken seriously.
- Teaching basic life skills is not a priority. Teaching students to be ready for the real world is just not important…but standardized testing sure is.
I know this may be a hot topic, but after my experience, even with the wonderful years and the impact I made on students and the imprint they left on me, all in all I don’t want my kids going to public school. I don’t think the American public school social aspect is necessary. I am terrified of the language and phrases my kids could learn. I don’t think that the drama is necessary or something they have to endure.
With myself and my husband both having our background in education, I think either a private school or homeschool would be better served for our children. I think a life on the road (until high school) where we can teach them about the world, different climates, different ecosystems, visit true landmarks, discuss true history would be more beneficial. To go on mission trips to truly understand poverty, different cultures, the essence of hard work, basic life skills and the importance of serving others. All of the above would hardly be discussed in a public-school class room. I know there are AMAZING teachers and administration out there, but sadly most is out of their hands.
We would teach our daughters about true economics and how to balance their finances so they don’t fall into the credit card/debt trap that is so common in our country. We would make sure to set them up for true success.
By high school we are pretty certain we’ve found the best (in our eyes so far) school to attend. It is out of state, it is private, it is rigorous, it has an outstanding athletic program, unprecedented academics, truly phenomenal fine arts programs…it is too bad that some of our public schools can’t be this way. And I think it is also important to note that my husband and I have worked in 11 public schools (in two different states) so, we have a pretty good idea of the public-school system.
If you do have your children enrolled in public schools, I urge you to not only be involved in your child’s life, but their teachers, the school, be on the PTA, know what is going on. Write to the superintendent when something doesn’t seem right. That is the only way public schools will start to get better — if the parents demand it.
But for now, for this former school teacher, I don’t want my kids going to public school. I know my children will receive the best education possible in all aspects and having me close by to keep them safe, makes my mama heart happy.
We love and respect all viewpoints at Austin Moms Blog. While this contributor feels that public education is not right for them, it is right for a lot of the other contributors at Austin Moms Blog. Here is another viewpoint on public schools.
I feel the same way as a former high school math teacher turned SAHM. I think my biggest concern are the overabundance of social time in conjunction with declining acadence rigor (and real life practicality). I can’t wait to read more from you on this topic.
I couldn’t agree more but this article. I have 3 girls 17, 12, and 7. My oldest has been homeschooled for the past 10 years and she is graduating top of her class this year. We have loved allowing her to learn at home, great experience. Now our middle child she is in public school, trust me some kids need to be in public school. LOL I tried one semester at home and we were done….enough said. Now rhe main reason i commenetd back was because of my youngest daughter. Last year she started kindergarten, she had the best year, with an amazing first year teacher. My daughter absolutely loved her!! But when this year rolled around my daughter was placed with a teacher thatvhas no business being a teacher. I would go to lunch everyday last year and i would see this teacher verbally abuse her children and it broke my heart. So when i saw her name i freaked out. I immediately called the school and requested a new teacher, the school seemed to be angry with me after i told them why, mind you i reported her last year with no success apparently because she is still there. The school allowed for a transfer but after the first week and a half of school we pulled our youngest out and now i am homeschooling her as well. My daughter kept coming home upset saying her teacher is mean she yells at the kids in her class, and the kids in her class just dont listen. You are right there is no respect for the teachers so learning is at a stand still. Her school is all about the dollar so they dont care they just want bodies in the classroom. I am not bitter my middle child went to this same school for 5 years and had a wonderful experience, so yes i have seen both sides. I am just grateful i a can homeschool my girls because the public school system fails so many children. My middle child thrives in public school, but not all do. The public school system needs to wake up and make some serious changes, and parents do your part and raise your children so they aren’t little monsters in school.
Sadly this article contains so many generalizations… one that stood out most was that “having an IEP is a giant joke and not taken seriously”. Unfortunately it seems you either are unaware of how special education services work, have never seen caring and thoughtful special education teachers pour their hearts in to teaching kids exactly how they need to be taught, or simply added that for the sake of the article. It seems you are running on fear… fear your child will hear bad words, experience drama, not be challenged, have a kid that misbehaves in class… well that is life. And public school gives kids a chance to learn how to not only be a light to others and a positive influence but also how to navigate when they encounter new situations. While most articles on this topic nowadays tend to state that each family should do what’s best for their family you simply went on a bash of public schools. You basically looked down on hardworking teachers, teaching assistants, administrators, and parent volunteers that work tirelessly to provide an amazing educational experience. Maybe for your next article try to not alienate a good chunk of the readers with your opposing views.
Yes, yes, and yes. Thank you for calling this article out. It was hard to read. The article… not your response 😉
Thank-you! As a high school science teacher and head swim coach I couldn’t agree more!!! I feel sorry for this writer who obviously had a negative work environment. I have been fortunate to work in a rigorous, supportive delartment while acting as a role model to my athletes. I see coaches and teachers instilling positive constructive life skills with their students, whether it be at the lab table, small group collaboration, on the field, on the court, or in the pool.
On another note, and I am by no means bashing private schools, every single transfer student we got coming from a private school was terribly behind – at least in the subject I teach (Chemistry and Physics – both required for upper level graduation plans in Texas). My heart hurt for those students because they struggled with the social aspect of school as well. I know they gained a lot of good, positive knowledge and had academic strengths but it was a consistent observation that they all had in common.
Absolutely agree with your comment, Tiffany!
Let me start with this, everyone is entitled to their opinion.
Now, here is mine. I wanted to be sick when I read this blog post. What about the families that don’t have a choice? I too was an educator and taught at-risk youth. These students didn’t have the opportunity to travel and already understood what the real world had in store. They came to school every day because they felt this gave them the opportunity to something bigger. Something more. It was their safe place. Every educator in that school I taught at, came in with the intention to fuel their students’ spirits and give them the tools they needed to be successful. We were their teachers, their confidantes, their advocates.
To say that students would hardly gain any knowledge around “true poverty” and “hard work” in the classroom, is a slap to the face for the kids I taught and honestly a slap in my face for making it sound as an educator that we don’t even relate or respond to our students. Absurd. Are you stating that all services, staff, and educators are not dedicated to providing what is necessary for children to be successful? This article eliminates the efforts, dedication, and endless hours that so many hardworking educators and staff give to provide students what they need.
As a parent of two children and former educator, both have taught me to not cast shadows nor make generalizations. That’s the issue with our society today. Privilege. This article really shouts privilege and honestly, saddens me. You don’t have to travel to teach your kids poverty, hard work, or serving others. Start by removing privilege and making over the top generalizations about others. Be the change.
You say “That is the only way public schools will start to get better, is if the parents demand it.” But you are warning parents away from public school and running away from it yourself. So how, exactly, can it get better, if people with that power turn their backs on it?
I’m curious to learn if you or your husband attended private school or public and what your experiences were. I attended private, Catholic schools from 1st grade through 12th. My high school was all-girls, academically rigorous, had outstanding sports programs, and was focused on college preparation–the best high school in the state. However, I definitely still encountered/witnessed mean girls, foul language, forward boys, drug use, and lots of drama (throughout elementary and high school). Those things are not unique to public schools. You mentioned homeschooling–that is the only way to control your child’s social experiences during the school day. Otherwise, the best we can do is prepare our children and give them the tools to navigate those situations with grace, which it seems you are already doing. Good job, Mama! I hope you are able to find a solution that works for your family!
I respect your experience and opinion. I don’t disagree with all of your points. I try not to speak or think in absolutes – it’s always gotten me into trouble.
From where I sit, it seems like you’ve got some pretty big ideals and it’s always good to have a road map with a willingness to find another route or two when necessary.
Since your oldest is 3 1/2, I’d caution you to keep an open mind. As a teacher, you know their desires, goals, learning styles and abilities will weigh heavily on your choices. We often hit surprise detours on our way.
Good luck.
My wife and I are of the same mind as the author. I wish we had the freedom to travel as in her plan, but our twin boys will be enrolled in private school for all of the reasons she stated. I also look forward to hearing more from her on this topic.
But wouldn’t Jesus want us to support the public schools? He was a big fan of the poor, no?
It sounds like you taught at a terrible public school. Not one of your nine bullet points reflects anything in my experience with public schools at any level. The schools my girls have attended have put a heavy emphasis on character and service, inclusion and respect. They are taught to use technology effectively, but phones/social media/etc. are not allowed in the classroom if they are not part of a learning activity. Oh, and they also have outstanding academics.
And even if your points were valid (which they may be in some locations), then perhaps you’d be better off supporting the public schools that educate the vast majority of the children in this country and helping them improve, rather than quarantining your precious offspring away from the influence of their peers.
I will make one specific point – from a social aspect for girls, by far the most toxic environment I ever experienced in my life was at a private “Christian” school.
Exactly what I have been saying for years.
I’m a big follower of Dave Ramsey, and he says there’s only three reasons not to put your kids in public school: education, religion, and safety. In this day, in this part of the country, I think all three apply.