How’s that for a catchy tagline? Do I have your attention now? Ok good, so let me explain why I spoil my kids. I have 3…one from my vagina, and 2 from marriage.
There’s something so polarizing about the word “spoil.” There are countless articles, and studies about how to NOT spoil your children because you could potentially turn them into little ungrateful tyrants with no manners and a sense of entitlement for all things, kind of like what Donald Trumps mama did, I digress…
But, really, can we talk about “spoiling” our kids in a different light? Can we call it something else? Like generously giving them all we have? Prioritizing them appropriately? Gosh, I feel like we live in a world that preaches so much #metime, and not enough selfless, exhausting, over the top #childtime.
This is what I wanted motherhood to look like for me. Abundantly giving to my child, my time, my excitement, my attention, my creativity, my love, and if every-time we go to Target we grab a little something from the dollar bin, so be it! If my kid wants a Deadpool vs Black Panther birthday party, I’m going to work my ass off to make sure that happens…and if he needs/wants me to lay with him as he falls asleep, I will…even if I have a million things I need to be doing, I will. Spoiling isn’t about stuff. It’s about GIVING. The early season of motherhood (which is what I am in) is supposed to be madness and craziness, and exhausting but it’s also so damn magical. With the dance parties, the snuggles, the instant soulmate, the boo boo kissing, the booty wiping, the tantrum negotiating and everything in between, I believe it is our job, as mothers to spoil our children.
Ok, so let me talk about what that doesn’t look like in my house. It doesn’t mean demands. My kids are pretty brilliant when it comes to manners, and understanding that no means no. But we always explain the NO, so there’s a true and meaningful understanding of why mama can’t make their request happen at that moment. Like, no, you can’t have a cupcake for breakfast because it’s full of sugar, it’s not good for your body and treats are for special occasions. I’ve set a boundary, and they feel heard.
Spoiling also doesn’t look like a plethora of stuff all over the place. You moms know what I’m talking about…the random toy pieces, the 1/2 lego set, the Barbie that we NEEDED, and never played with. We gift give intentionally. We have three little ones living in our home, we’ve got tons of toys and costumes, but when it comes to birthdays or holidays, we are intentional. This Christmas, we did a craft, a book, a fun gift, a game, and an activity for each kid. All of which get utilized almost daily. Well, except the roller blades, that might’ve been a little aggressive on my part for my 3 and 4-year-olds.
But really, isn’t motherhood the time of our life? Isn’t one of the best parts getting to fill your little ones spirit and mind with so much magic? So many memories? Spoil THEM. Spoil them with your time. With your ability to be silly and goofy. With your patience. Spoil them with the one thing you wanted when you were a kid and didn’t get. Make them your world. SPOIL THEM, MAMA, these little, tiny, amazing creatures live for it.