I just gave birth to a tiny human three months ago (in May), and I’ll be starting a job in two weeks. So I guess technically I’ll be going back to work with a 4-month-old….
Anyways, I’m sure you’re wondering why? Why in the world are you going back to work when you’ve been a SAHM for two years and could still stay home? Why not continue to spend your days with your toddler and your new baby? Why not give your new baby the same time you did to your older kiddo?
The honest answer, one that makes me cringe just by thinking it let alone saying it, is that I’m no longer fulfilled.
I know that makes me sound like a terrible mother. I’m sure I’ll receive some comments about how I should appreciate the chance to be home and watch my girls grow, how I’ll be regretting my decision soon enough because giving my daughters over to strangers to care for them will be gut-wrenching.
Trust me. I know.
At the time of writing this post my newborn has been going to daycare for three days, my oldest has been going to daycare for two months. I’ve cried, I’ve had moments of panic and anxiety, and I’ve mourned for the fact that my kids aren’t with me all day.
But I’ve noticed that I smile more. I’m not stressed out at the end of the day.
When my girls are home, I’m more engaged with them, playing more, and I’m not grumpy. My excitement to start contributing in a different way to our household, coupled with the fact that I’ll be commuting, and working for a company whose values align with mine is giving me an extra skip to my step.
I’m sure there is going to be a moment where I’ll question my decision. I’m going to be upset because I missed a milestone or disappointed because I won’t be able to attend a doctor’s appointment or daycare activity. When those moments happen, I’ll remind myself that I’m returning to work to fulfill my career dreams. I’m showing my daughters that mom can bring home the (vegan) bacon alongside dad and still be a great momma. They’ll see that they can choose to be at home or work, either choice they make will be up to them.
Any SAHMs go back to work?
We’d love to hear your comments.